Mind Over Matter Coaching http://www.coachlindaryan.com Because your mind really does matter! Thu, 29 Jun 2017 14:47:48 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=4.8.1 What’s Better Than Gratitude? HAPPINESS! http://www.coachlindaryan.com/2017/06/gratitude-happiness/ http://www.coachlindaryan.com/2017/06/gratitude-happiness/#respond Thu, 29 Jun 2017 14:42:44 +0000 http://www.coachlindaryan.com/?p=5612 What’s better than gratitude? If you’d asked me this last week, my answer would be “Nothing.” Nothing is better than gratitude.   Today I have a different answer, which is HAPPINESS. Happiness, (according to NY Times bestselling author of The Untethered Soul, Michael A. Singer) is even better than gratitude. He didn’t actually say that; […]

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What’s better than gratitude?

If you’d asked me this last week, my answer would be “Nothing.”

Nothing is better than gratitude.

 

Today I have a different answer, which is HAPPINESS.

Happiness, (according to NY Times bestselling author of The Untethered Soul, Michael A. Singer) is even better than gratitude.


He didn’t actually say that; it’s what I inferred while reading this book.


In fact, in the entire book, he doesn’t even mention the word gratitude once. But he devoted an entire chapter to “Unconditional Happiness.”

 

Here’s my big takeaway/a-ha moment/call to action for this next stage of my journey.

Tell me if you agree.

 

Up until now, I’ve learned to use gratitude, to bring me out of a funk. When I feel worried, angry, frustrated (any of those low-frequency emotions), I force myself to shift my thoughts to something I’m grateful for.


It’s not that hard to do, and it helps tremendously. You just need to remember to do it. And the more you do it, the easier it gets, so I’ve gotten pretty good at doing that.


Maybe you have, too?

 

moon grateful

 

If so, try kicking it up a notch and instead of shifting to gratitude, shift to happiness.


In practicing this, I’m finding that it’s an entirely different animal. Here’s an example. . .


The other day, I knocked over my beautiful breakfast smoothie. All 16 ounces of green deliciousness, splattered all over the counter, open dishwasher and just-cleaned floor, before I even took one sip.


Now I am not going to tell you that I wasn’t . . . let’s just say “perturbed” . . . because I definitely was. (I may have even  said a couple of bad words!


I’ll spare you all the thoughts that went through my mind in that moment, but I’ll tell you that, only because I’m working on this idea of unconditional happiness, I was able to catch myself pretty quickly.


I acknowledged it as an opportunity to practice, and before I knew it, I was laughing at myself for even considering letting go of the happiness I’d been feeling, imagining how good that first sip was going to taste.


And that’s when it hit me ~ THIS is what he’s talking about ~ and it IS possible!

 

 

 

via GIPHY

 

Just trying to remain happy during this
unfortunate event, allowed me to remain happy.


It was rather amazing. And it was much, much easier than I would have believed, if I hadn’t tried it.


So now, I had to go make a new graphic . . .

 

 

When the going gets tough (1)

 

 

Over to YOU . . .

Have you read “The Untethered Soul,” or another book that got you re-thinking what you thought you knew?

What do you think about this idea of unconditional happiness (choosing to be happy, no matter what happens)?

Does it seem absurd or unrealistic?

Do you think it’s possible?

And most important, how do you react when you spill your smoothie (or coffee, or cocktail) ?

These aren’t rhetorical questions; I’d love to hear your thoughts, in the comments 🙂

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Happy (or maybe sad) Father’s Day! http://www.coachlindaryan.com/2017/06/happy-maybe-sad-fathers-day/ http://www.coachlindaryan.com/2017/06/happy-maybe-sad-fathers-day/#respond Sun, 18 Jun 2017 12:18:05 +0000 http://www.coachlindaryan.com/?p=5587 This post is for anyone who is missing their Dad this Father’s Day. Maybe he’s passed away, and this is your first Father’s Day without him. Maybe he passed away decades ago, but you’re especially missing him today. Maybe he’s still alive, but you don’t have a relationship with him. Maybe he’s alive and well, but […]

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This post is for anyone who is missing their Dad this Father’s Day.

Maybe he’s passed away, and this is your first Father’s Day without him.
Maybe he passed away decades ago, but you’re especially missing him today.
Maybe he’s still alive, but you don’t have a relationship with him.
Maybe he’s alive and well, but distance prevents you from being with him today.
Maybe he has Alzheimer’s and he doesn’t recognize or remember you.
Or maybe you’re a Dad who has lost a child, and this day makes your heart hurt.

This post is for anyone missing their Dad today, and most of all . . .

This post is for my children.

Father’s Day, like Mother’s Day, is all about appreciating your parents. One day, out of 365, when you go all out to let your folks know how much you love them.

And that first year without them is truly, truly . . .yucky.

While you miss them every day, somehow a holiday designed for the purpose of celebrating them just makes things feel sadder and emptier than usual.

I lost my Dad 25 years ago, but having three children and a husband to spoil, made that first one a whole lot easier. I missed him, and I felt sad, but I was distracted enough to have the day come and go.

And then, that “first one” was over.

Despite being divorced for over 15 years, I still contend that the father of my children was THE BEST DAD IN THE WORLD. Most of my friends were jealous, because no matter how many hours he worked, when he came through that door, he thoroughly embraced being a Dad.

It didn’t matter what needed to be done ~ baths, homework, papier-mâché solar system projects~ he enthusiastically jumped in with both feet and insisted I take a break. (Did I mention he was THE best Dad in the world?)

When we separated, I still made sure his Father’s Days were special. And as our kids grew into young adults, they took care of the Father’s Day festivities on their own; they’d buy him gifts, prepare the food and always made sure he had a great day.

Unfortunately, this year is that year for them; their Dad passed away in November and my heart is aching with the emptiness they must feel.

So I’m doing the only thing I can think of to help fill the void; I’m planning a celebration of their exceptional Dad.

This really wasn’t my idea; the inspiration came from an episode of my, and possibly your, favorite new show, called “This Is Us.”

The character William, who was Randall’s biological father, succumbs to his battle with cancer. After his death, they find a letter he wrote to Randall’s two young daughters, instructing them to plan his memorial.

He didn’t want sadness and tears; he wanted loving memories to bring them joy. So the girls got busy and executed his wish.

Upon arrival, each guest was given a little cup of M&M’s, representing all the pills William took each morning.

Next, they had a table full of hats and asked everyone to put one on, as William always wore a hat.

And finally, the girls led a procession around the neighborhood~ taking the same walk their Grandpa took every single morning.

It was a beautiful celebration of a wonderful man. And while it made me cry, it also inspired me to invite my kids over to celebrate another wonderful man ~ their father.

No matter what time we eat, we’ll call it brunch, because brunch was his favorite meal.

He didn’t take pills, so there won’t be any M&M’s, but there will be KFC and macaroni salad, two of his favorites.

And wine coolers. (He’s the only man I know who preferred a dainty wine cooler over a nice cold beer!)

 

And instead of walking through the neighborhood, we’ll walk to the beach. Their Dad, also named William, was an amazing artist, and created some exquisite sand sculptures. He always drew a crowd, as he transformed a giant mound of sand (or snow) into an octopus or a mermaid or a sea lion.

So yeah, this day, Father’s Day, is a wonderful day for many, many people. If you’ve got your Dad, give him an extra hug today. And if you’re missing your Dad today, for whatever reason, give yourself an extra hug, and celebrate all the wonderful, funny memories.

And if you know someone else who might be missing their Dad today, consider giving them a call, or sending an email or a text to let them know you’re thinking of them.

I just did. 

 

If you’re not familiar with “This is Us”, this beautiful trailer will have you hooked.

 

 

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Godspeed to my Favorite Couple http://www.coachlindaryan.com/2017/04/godspeed/ http://www.coachlindaryan.com/2017/04/godspeed/#comments Mon, 01 May 2017 02:12:27 +0000 http://www.coachlindaryan.com/?p=5510 I just learned the meaning of Godspeed. I thought I knew what it meant, and I was pretty close. Here’s how Dictionary.com defines it.   So I’d like to send some Godspeed to my firstborn, her beautiful beau, and their impossible-not-to-adore dog, as they say Goodbye to Chicago and Hello to… whatever is next for them. […]

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I just learned the meaning of Godspeed.

I thought I knew what it meant, and I was pretty close. Here’s how Dictionary.com defines it.

Screen Shot 2017-04-30 at 10.56.08 AM

 

So I’d like to send some Godspeed to my firstborn, her beautiful beau, and their impossible-not-to-adore dog, as they say Goodbye to Chicago and Hello to… whatever is next for them.

Oh, and by the way. . .

this is one of those You don’t need to read it, but I need to write it posts, and here’s why. . .

 

I love these guys!

 

I love them, and I love their story.

I love their love story!

And I want to share it with you, because it’s a perfect example of how the Law of Attraction works. 

Whitney and Joe met working at a summer camp in the Poconos in 2007.

On the weekends, whoever had off, piled into a giant van and went “somewhere” for 48 hours. One weekend they descended upon my house for lunch. A lovely group of variously-accented 20-somethings sauntered in, ate some food, and sauntered out.

A few days later Whitney called and asked me what I thought of her camp friends.

 

Me: They’re adorable! And awesome!
Whitney: What do you think of Joe, specifically….
Me: (interrupting) omg, he is really cute!
Whitney: … because I’m kind of “with him.”

via GIPHY

 

Me: That’s awesome! But camp is almost over and he lives in ENGLAND!!!

 

Fast forward TEN YEARS, and they’re still together. Under very unlikely circumstances, they made it work.

Just like I tell my clients (and anyone else who will listen), when you get your thoughts, feelings and actions in sync with what you want, the Universe/God intercedes, and escorts you down the path.

I love thinking of Whitney and Joe’s relationship and connecting the dots of all the countless things that had to line up, that did line up, for them to be together; things that they never could have planned nor predicted.


Such as  . . . 

 

  • March 2007 ~ before they’d even met, Whitney was awarded a full year scholarship from The Saint Andrews Society of Philadelphia and would be doing her junior year of college abroad
  • August 2007 ~ when camp ended, Joe did some traveling before his return to the UK, and his favorite place on the tour was Chicago.
  • September 2007 ~ Whitney packs her bags and leaves for Scotland.
  • October 2007 ~ Flights between Scotland and Joe’s home in England took about 40 minutes  and cost about $40.So they had a (compared to Whitney living in the U.S.) relatively easy long-distance romance that year.
  • June 2008 ~ They ended Whitney’s year abroad with a week-long adventure to Ireland, compliments of Whitney’s Dad.
  • September 2008 ~ Joe, who had just graduated from college, (oh excuse me, Uni-vehhsity) was asked to lead a new division of his Dad’s company… in the U.S.They wanted him to set up shop in, (drumroll please…)  ~ CHICAGO!
  • 2008-2009 ~ Another long-distance, but do-able relationship, through Whitney’s last year of college.After graduation, she moved to Chicago to be with Joe and put her Psychology/Marketing degree to work. . . by getting a part-time job in a hair salon and walking dogs in Chi-town.
  • 2011 ~ They moved from Chicago to NJ as Joe’s business expanded.With her new found experience, Whitney takes a job at a local hair salon, focusing on organizing their systems and developing their social media presence.

    And they adopt the cutest, sweetest, happiest dog on the planet, Brody.

brody heater

  • 2013-ish ~ Whitney accepts the position of Social Media Director at the very same camp she and Joe met at. 
  • January 2015~ move back to Chicago, in a BLIZZARD, (Who moves to Chicago in January?) as Muzo expands even more.
  • January 2017 ~ they find out their apartment has been sold and they have to move out by May 1st
  • February 2017 ~ they decide to live with me for the Summer, until they decide where their next home will be
  • Late April 2017 ~They sell/donate/purge much of their “stuff”, pack up what’s left, hop in a truck and head “home,” to NJ. 

    But before that, they invite me out for a fan-flippin’-TASTIC weekend in Chicago and show me why they’ve loved living there so much. Now I’m as sad as they are, that they’re leaving.

IMG_3632

  • May 1, 2017 (today!) ~ they brave torrential rain storms as they make the trek (one last time) from Chicago to NJ to enjoy Spring + Summer at the beautiful Jersey shore.

To me, that’s a whole lotta serendipity~ another great word . . .

 

Screen Shot 2017-04-30 at 5.38.55 PM

 

So here’s to you, Whitney and Joe, as you begin a new adventure on your journey.

If there was a Universal Yearbook, and they did Senior Superlatives, you guys would be a shoo-in for “Cutest Couple.”
Screen Shot 2017-04-30 at 9.59.41 PM
And if anyone wants to know how to rock the Law of Attraction, all they need to do is watch the two of you! 

Godspeed <3

Screen Shot 2017-04-30 at 9.47.21 PM

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When the Student is Ready, the MOUSE Appears? http://www.coachlindaryan.com/2017/04/mouse-teacher/ http://www.coachlindaryan.com/2017/04/mouse-teacher/#comments Tue, 18 Apr 2017 11:45:03 +0000 http://www.coachlindaryan.com/?p=5490 Sometimes we learn the greatest lessons when we’re unaware a new teacher has appeared.   In my case, the teacher was this teeny-tiny, itsy-bitsy mouse. And he showed up, uninvited, in my laundry room a few months ago.     So small. So harmless. So. Incredibly. Terrifying.   I’ve been through some tough stuff in […]

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Sometimes we learn the greatest lessons when we’re unaware a new teacher has appeared.

 

In my case, the teacher was this teeny-tiny, itsy-bitsy mouse.
And he showed up, uninvited, in my laundry room a few months ago.

 

mouse

 

So small.

So harmless.

So. Incredibly. Terrifying.

 

I’ve been through some tough stuff in my life, and I consider myself a strong, sensible, capable person.

 

But when it comes to a mouse in my house…
weak,
weak,
w.e.a.k.

 

After I got done com-pletely freaking out, I took a deep breath and said “You can do this, Linda! It’s just a mouse. It’s gonna be fine. It’s gonna be fine. It’s gonna be fine!!! 

 

I bought one of those catch & release mousetraps, because I didn’t want to hurt the little guy; I just wanted him OUT of my house as quickly as humanly possible.


No more than five minutes after I set the trap, I had him!

 

He went in, the door closed and all was (almost) right with the world again.

 

I decided to transfer him from the trap into an empty coffee can, thinking that would be a safer way to bring him outside.

 

No risk of dropping the trap and having him fall out, because that would be horrific, and the coffee can had a nice, secure fitting lid.

 

What I didn’t plan on was him catapulting OUT of that coffee can, before I got the lid on.

 

He jumped into my kitchen sink, down into the garbage disposal (I did think about it… ), darted back out into the sink, onto my counters, back and forth, back and forth, back and forth, until he leapt to the floor, finding a secure spot behind my refrigerator.

 

via GIPHY

.
 

More deep breaths.

More self-talk.

 

“Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, OH MY GOD!!!

It’s OK, it’s OK, it’s OK, it’s OK, IT’S OK!!!

 

Take a breath!

 

You caught him once, you’ll catch him again. And this time you’ll just leave him in the flippin’ trap UNTIL he’s outside.


B.r.e.a.t.h.e…

 

 

Fast forward to Day #THREE …

The mouse was still at large.
I caught him once, but he escaped.
thought I caught him a second time, but this video proves otherwise.

 

mousetrap

 (How utterly embarrassing! AND terrifying!)

 

 

Here’s what I learned … 

 

  • I do have control over my thoughts, even when I’m scared.

While I agree it may not be normal  to tell yourself “this is a harmless little creature who is way more afraid of me than I am of him,” it is possible.

I realized all the scary thoughts…

(mice are disgusting, germ-carrying varmints, they might bite you, they could crawl up inside the bottom of your pants and ultimately kill you, etc)

while they seemed to come effortlessly, they were also my choice.

 

  • Things can happen F-A-S-T!

I caught him within five minutes.

I lost him within five seconds.

 

  • Deep breaths really do help! 

I remembered a story from a favorite book, Outrageous Openness, by Tosha Silver. In it, she tells of how she overcame her debilitating fear of spiders.

One night she noticed a rather large one on her ceiling, as she climbed into bed. She took several deep breaths and had a little chat with this spider.

The conversation ended with “… you stay up there and I’ll stay down here.”

And in the morning, it was gone.

The deep breath helps you to pause momentarily, which interrupts the energy flow.

In this case, the energy I was emitting was that of fear and panic, neither of which are conducive to catching a mouse.

Deep breaths/interrupting that energy helped me a lot.

 

  • Like mice, your friends will come out of the woodwork to support you. 

Many of you helped me by sharing your mouse tale on Facebook.

It felt good to know I wasn’t the only one who’s ever had a disgusting little critter in my home.

I also got some good advice on remedies ie. peppermint oil soaked cotton balls keep mice away. Who knew?!

 

  • Comparing a bad thing to something worse always helps!

This might sound silly Lilly, but it seriously helped me when a friend said “Linda it’s a mouse, not a rattlesnake!

#perspective 

 

  • Past memories will easily influence your present behavior.

 

Ever been on a bad date? Did you remember that when the next date came?

Ever lost weight and gained it back? Did you think of that when you started a new diet?

How about being really organized and efficient and then falling off the wagon?

Thinking about those failures is not helpful when trying to move forward!

I was all about how I’d caught him and he’d escaped. And what if he did that again? And what if my friends were right, and there were MORE???

NOT HELPFUL!

I needed to calm the heck down, thought-wise. I pushed those not helpful thoughts out of my mind and focused on the outcome I wanted. Not easy, but possible. 

 

  • Well-intentioned friends can sometimes make you feel worse 

While I believe everyone meant well, some of the comments were so not helpful. For example…

“There’s never just one mouse.”

“You better call an exterminator before his siblings start showing up!”

“You need to get those snap-traps and be done with it!”

 

  • Well-intentioned friends know what they’re talking about. 

Ultimately, over a two-week period, I caught SIXTEEN mice.

Two snap-traps at a time.

#dontjudgeme

 

And finally

 

  • The best laid plans of mice and men often go awry~ let it go

I am an animal lover, and I intended to capture and release this harmless creature, while singing Kumbaya.

I thought there was just one and I thought I would catch him quickly and get back to the rest of my life.

I’ve come to terms with opting for the snap-traps. I told myself that those innocent little mice (who had no business being in my business!) had a good life. And just one bad day.

How many of us can say that?

Over to you…

Have you ever had a mouse or another unwanted critter in your house?

If so, how did you handle it? And yourself?

Have you ever had to put what you know into practice, when faced with a scary situation?

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Try Not Trying http://www.coachlindaryan.com/2017/04/try-not-trying/ http://www.coachlindaryan.com/2017/04/try-not-trying/#comments Sun, 02 Apr 2017 22:36:51 +0000 http://www.coachlindaryan.com/?p=5200 I was going to start by saying “I consider myself a bit of a wordsmith…” but then I looked up the definition (an expert in the use of words) and decided against it.   Instead, I’ll call myself a word-noticer. Doesn’t roll off the tongue like wordsmith, but it’s more accurate.   I tend to […]

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I was going to start by saying “I consider myself a bit of a wordsmith…” but then I looked up the definition (an expert in the use of words) and decided against it.

 

Instead, I’ll call myself a word-noticer. Doesn’t roll off the tongue like wordsmith, but it’s more accurate.

 

I tend to notice words people use. I don’t do this consciously; it’s more of a habit I’ve picked up through the years, studying the mind.

 

My clients will tell you I interrupt them regularly, while they’re telling me what their action items are for the week. I’m sure it gets annoying, but I’m there to help them, and sometimes changing a word can really make a difference.

 

For example, I practically always suggest they get rid of their “try.”

 

“I’m gonna try to journal everyday this week.”

“I’m gonna try to finish my taxes this week.”

How about eating healthy? Ever tried that?

 

Look at how powerful those statements become when you get rid of the try!

 

I’m gonna journal everyday!
I’m gonna finish my taxes!
I’m gonna eat healthy!

The exclamation point is practically unavoidable!

 

Getting rid of the “try” makes it more of an intention; an affirmation. A positive statement about something you’re going to get done.

 

Another thing I’ve noticed, as a word-noticer, is we don’t use try, when we’re stating something we enjoy doing. For example, I’m gonna finish watching the third season of “Grace & Frankie” this week.

 

I’m not gonna try to finish it. In fact, I’m going to savor each episode like an expensive bottle of wine. I don’t want to finish the season, because then it will be over. <insert sad face>.

 

But can you see the inherent negativity, if you will, of the word try? We generally use it when we’re talking about things we don’t really feel like doing, or things we feel we may not be able to complete.

 

You may be thinking “But it’s good to try. Why is she saying it’s negative?”

 

Of course it’s good to try; just don’t use that word when you’re setting an intention. Just strike it from your goal-setting vocabulary.

 

What you’ll find, is you increase the possibility of success when you eliminate the try. Seriously.

 

That’s my tip for the week~ stop trying to do the thing and go do it!

 

And in case you’re not familiar with Grace and Frankie

 

 

 

via GIPHY

 

You really should get on that!

 

Over to you…

Do you use the word “try” a lot?

Do you notice that you’re using it?

Do you think it makes a difference?

How about if this week you try to not use the word try?

 

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Contemplating Death http://www.coachlindaryan.com/2017/03/contemplating-death/ http://www.coachlindaryan.com/2017/03/contemplating-death/#comments Mon, 06 Mar 2017 00:13:18 +0000 http://www.coachlindaryan.com/?p=5401 I just finished reading (and enthusiastically recommend) “the untethered soul,” by Michael A. Singer. And today I want to tell you about my favorite chapter, titled Contemplating Death. I like it so much and feel it’s so important, that I recorded it for you to hear. Just click on the arrow below to hear the […]

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I just finished reading (and enthusiastically recommend) “the untethered soul,” by Michael A. Singer. And today I want to tell you about my favorite chapter, titled Contemplating Death.

I like it so much and feel it’s so important, that I recorded it for you to hear. Just click on the arrow below to hear the recording.

untethered soulBefore you start thinking this is going to be a dark or depressing post, let me assure you it is neither of those. Singer begins the chapter by telling us


Death is not a morbid thought.
Death is the greatest teacher in all of life.


It’s something we all have in common; no one is exempt.

We’re all going to die one day, and unless you’re on Death Row (no pun intended), you have no idea when that day will be.

 

He points out that death can happen to babies, teenagers, middle aged people; not just the elderly. Although some people get sick, receive a diagnosis and prognosis, most people die without any warning at all.

 

Nada. Zilch. Zero. None.

 

 

 

nada

 

 

 

Singer asks us to consider what we would do if we were told we only had one week to live.

This sounded like a dark, depressing exercise to me, but it turned out to be a happy little reminder of what’s most important.

And what’s not important at all.

He says…

 

“Think honestly about what you would do with your last week.
Then ponder this question:
If that’s really what you would do with your last week,
what are you doing with the rest of your time?”
.

 

 

I found it interesting that most of what I would do involved writing. For example, I would write down all the important info my kids would need, like account numbers, passwords and most importantly, where my fortune is buried.

 

laughter

 

The next thing I thought I would do is write letters to all the important people in my life, especially my children. I would tell them how proud they’ve made me and what an honor it was to be their Mombo.

I’d tell them to BE HAPPY + GRATEFUL every single day, and let go of any petty annoyances.

I’d tell them to remember all the fun and laughter and love we shared and let that overshadow any sadness about my death.

I’d ask them to stay close to one another and celebrate together.

Since they all have amazing partners, I’d encourage them to work through any problems that might come up, rather than leave, thinking the grass might be greener somewhere else.

It’s not.

I’d apologize (again) for turning their worlds upside down, by getting divorced.

And I’d end with a funny memory, like the time Whitney cried over Monopoly, while telling her (much!) younger sister (who was winning!) to stop being such a baby.

Or the time Kelsey asked “Where’s the crib Mombo?” after opening her Bitty Baby from Santa. (We didn’t get her the crib) #ranoutofmoney 

crib

Or the time sweet, trusting, little Jack Ryan let his older sisters put butterfly clips in his hair and apply more makeup than someone would wear to the Oscars. At four years old, he truly believed them when they said that makeup was invisible.

I’d write to my clients, past and present, thanking them for hiring me and encouraging them to keep going for their dreams.

I’d write to my Aunt Pat, thanking her for taking on the “Mom role,” when mine died, all those years ago.

I’d write to my college friends, thanking them for being a part of some of the best days of my life.

I’d write to a handful of very special friends and tell them what they added to my life and why I love them.

And then, when I was all done with all of that… I would write to my precious, perfect granddaughter.

I would write at least 18 letters to her, one for each birthday, until she graduated high school.

I would talk about things we’ve already done together, and I would share my memories from when I was her age.

There’d be a letter for her first day of Kindergarten.

And one for her High School graduation.

And there’d be a letter for my girls if either/both of them have a/another baby, telling them about breast-feeding, colic and teething. And especially about that special, precious MIRACLE called pregnancy. #omg

Interesting, I found a whole bunch of stuff i would write about. And here’s the great news: I can! And you can! And we don’t have to wait until we’ve been told we’re going to die.

 

WE  CAN DO THAT NOW!

You can.

I can.

We all can and we all should!

So what if we don’t die for another 50 years?

Who’s going to be upset that we imparted profound words of wisdom or told them how much we adore them NOW?

NOBODY, that’s who.

While I enthusiastically encourage you to read “The Untethered Soul,” I’ve recorded Chapter 17 for you, which you can listen to by entering your info below. 


 

Over to you…

What would you do if you found out you only had one week to live?

Would you want that advance notice?

And, as Michael Singer asks, if that’s really what you would do with your last week, what are you doing with the rest of your time? Pondering this is changing not only my attitude on life, but it’s making me more productive. Interesting…

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How I Fell in Love…with The Potato Detox http://www.coachlindaryan.com/2017/02/how-i-fell-in-love-with-the-potato-diet/ http://www.coachlindaryan.com/2017/02/how-i-fell-in-love-with-the-potato-diet/#comments Thu, 16 Feb 2017 20:35:10 +0000 http://www.coachlindaryan.com/?p=5381 On February 6th, I embarked on a 30-day healthy eating program, which is basically eating like a vegan, minus the nuts and oils. No meat. No dairy. No eggs. No fun, or so one might think. We kicked it off with a Potato Feast, where the only things we ate for five days, were potatoes.  […]

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On February 6th, I embarked on a 30-day healthy eating program, which is basically eating like a vegan, minus the nuts and oils.

No meat.
No dairy.
No eggs.
No fun, or so one might think.

We kicked it off with a Potato Feast, where the only things we ate for five days, were potatoes. 

Just potatoes.

Any kind, any color, any preparation method.
No butter, salt, sour cream. Nothing else.

Just potatoes.

potatobasket.

I expected to be bored and I expected to lose at least five pounds.

I was, and I did.

What I didn’t expect, was to fall in love… with the potato diet.

 

I should start by telling you I don’t really like potatoes very much. Except for french fries, and baked potatoes loaded with butter and sour cream, I could easily live without potatoes. And the thought of eating them plain was, well…

 

h

via GIPHY

 

 

Here are my takeaways:

  • Potatoes are very nutritious.
    I always thought of potatoes as a high calorie, low nutrient food, aka not good for me. Untrue.

Screen Shot 2017-02-16 at 1.53.17 PM

 

  • Potatoes satisfy hunger quickly and for long periods of time~ I went for hours (and hours!) between potatoes, and didn’t feel hungry.
  • There are unlimited ways to prepare potatoes~ baked, boiled, broiled, microwaved, roasted, french fried, potato chipped, spiral cut…. 

 

 

     potatoroasted        potatospiral       potatochip

 

 

  • Shopping for, preparing and eating just potatoes takes hardly any time, effort or money.
  • Eating just potatoes requires absolutely no mental energy. Zero.
  • It’s easy to always have a clean kitchen, when I only eat potatoes.
  • I generate very little garbage and no recycling when I only eat potatoes.
  • Giving my tastebuds a five day hiatus has made them work better than ever. Everything tastes more delectable; the flavors seem more vivid and intense.

 

And the last thing I learned ~ on Valentine’s Day, no less ~ is that the potato diet loves that I love it!

 

potatoheart

 

Over to You…

Have you ever tried the potato diet?

Have you ever done another radical regime, like a juice cleanse or a complete fast?

Can you imagine eating nothing, nada, zilch, zero except for potatoes?

***Special thanks to Gina Carr for turning me on to this AND other fascinating food facts.

If you’re wanting to eat healthier and lose some weight (how about a pound a day?!) you should check out Gina’s next group?

 

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Gratitude And Prozac Have This In Common http://www.coachlindaryan.com/2017/02/gratitude-for-what-didnt-happen/ http://www.coachlindaryan.com/2017/02/gratitude-for-what-didnt-happen/#comments Sat, 04 Feb 2017 22:02:31 +0000 http://www.coachlindaryan.com/?p=5365 Gratitude and Prozac both help Depression! Yesterday I read a great article which says that when we feel grateful, we boost our levels of the neurotransmitters, serotonin and dopamine. These are the same chemicals found in most widely used antidepressants. When we’re depressed, our bodies are usually deficient in dopamine and/or serotonin. These are the […]

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Gratitude and Prozac both help Depression!

Yesterday I read a great article which says that when we feel grateful, we boost our levels of the neurotransmitters, serotonin and dopamine. These are the same chemicals found in most widely used antidepressants.

When we’re depressed, our bodies are usually deficient in dopamine and/or serotonin. These are the very chemicals that help us feel happy and motivated and energetic.

We need to produce more of these to feel less depressed, but we can’t, because we’re feeling depressed.

 

 

 

80 GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

 

 

But here’s the good news:
To varying degrees, you can increase your dopamine and serotonin levels by thinking of things you are grateful for.

 

IMG_0232

 

 

But here’s another catch-22:
It’s hard to think of things you’re grateful for, because…well…you’re depressed! You may struggle to find anything worth appreciating. And even if you choose to go the medication route, they can takes several weeks, even months to work.

So try this…

Instead of trying to find something to feel grateful for, how about feeling gratitude for stuff that didn’t happen?

For example, I almost spilled an entire cup of coffee right on my laptop. It was a close call, that didn’t happen. Instead of just saying “WHOA, that was close!” I can spend a moment or two really feeeeling grateful about it.

Or when I almost smashed into the car in front of me, because I wasn’t paying attention.  Another scary close call!

This can be a really fun way to activate the feeling of gratitude. Think about all the times you didn’t fall, or didn’t have a car accident, or didn’t get struck by lightning, or didn’t lose your eyesight.

How about the time you didn’t sprain your ankle, or didn’t need a kidney transplant?  Remember when you didn’t get caught in a hurricane or a tornado or an avalanche or a tsunami?

And let’s not forget all those times you didn’t lose your car keys!

And even if you did trip and fall down the steps, wasn’t it cool how you didn’t die?

I often hear people say “I tried that Law Of Attraction thing and it didn’t work for me.”  And to that I say “Oh yes, it did!”

It always works~ every time, for every person.  It may just be that the gift you were given was the absence of something inconvenient or unpleasant or tragic.

Think about it. My bet is that when you do, you’ll become very aware of everything that’s going right, and you’ll feel grateful. And feeling grateful helps your body produce those feel good chemicals that make you… feel good, or at least better.

Over to You…

What do you do to pull yourself out of the doldrums?

Do you have a special trick you use to feel better, if you’re in a funk?

We’d love to hear your ideas!

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Can You See a Sign if Your Eyes are Closed? http://www.coachlindaryan.com/2016/12/sign-from-dad/ http://www.coachlindaryan.com/2016/12/sign-from-dad/#respond Mon, 19 Dec 2016 21:36:55 +0000 http://www.coachlindaryan.com/?p=5303 Question: Can you see a sign if your eyes are closed? Answer: Yes, as long as your mind is open. I absolutely love hearing about signs people receive after losing a loved one, and there’s a few reasons I sometimes blog about them… Most people (not all) find those kind of stories heart-warming and inspiring. Sure, […]

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Question: Can you see a sign if your eyes are closed?
Answer: Yes, as long as your mind is open.

I absolutely love hearing about signs people receive after losing a loved one, and there’s a few reasons I sometimes blog about them

  • Most people (not all) find those kind of stories heart-warming and inspiring. Sure, sometimes I’ll hear “whoa!~ that’s so creepy,” or “aw, that’s just coincidence,” but most people I talk to love the stories as much as I do.

 

  • Many people remember signs they’ve received, and they share them with us in the comments, or through email or social media.

 

  • I hope that by hearing these types of stories, you might be inspired to perceive things a little differently.

Because here’s the thing~ perception is a choice. And you can choose to shift your perception any time you want. Whether it’s about interpreting an event (like in the story below), or deciding if a goal is achievable, your perception greatly influences your outcome.


Here’s my newest heart-warming, inspiring story…

A few weeks ago, right before Thanksgiving, my three children lost their Dad very suddenly.

As you can imagine, there was a lot of sadness, shock and despair in the days that followed. And watching them maneuver through these days has made me prouder than I’ve ever felt, as their Mom.

A few days after the funeral, our daughter Kelsea experienced something she considered to be a sign, from her Dad. But it wasn’t inherent in what happened; it was how Kelsea interpretted or perceived what happened that allowed all of us to appreciate it and feel really happy.

Quick backstory~
Eight months prior, Kelsea gave birth to the most beautiful baby girl I have ever seen in.my.life. ~ our first grandchild.

Kelsea said she was thinking about how sad it would be at Christmas, as her Dad loved to buy presents, and now he wouldn’t be there for Adelynn’s first.

In her sadness, she walked down to the basement to do laundry. As she got to the bottom of the stairs, she noticed a giant gift basket, beautifully wrapped in cellophane, chock full of baby toys!

And guess where it came from… Kelsea’s Dad/Adelynn’s Grandfather!

 

 

tomcruise

 

Kelsea explained that a few weeks after Addelynn’s birth, her Dad went to a silent auction and won a giant basket full of children’s toys. He gave it to Kelsea, saying “she won’t be ready for this stuff yet, but it will come in handy once she’s older.”  

Thinking her three-week old baby wouldn’t be needing stacking cubes or wooden puzzles any time soon, Kelsea tucked them away in the basement.

And eight months later, a few days after her Dad’s death, just a few weeks before Christmas, she found them. She had completely forgotten about them, and she found them on this day, at this moment.

And the toys are perfect for an eight-month-old… and a one-year-old, and a three-year-old… so it looks like Adelynn will be getting gifts from her Grandpa Bill, for many years to come. 

 

 

addy1

 

What made me feel so good about this story, is that Kelsea felt happy when she found the gifts. She could have, just as easily, felt sad. But she perceived this basket as a sign from her Dad, and her sadness quickly turned to joy as she received it. And then everyone who heard the story afterwards, also experienced that joy.

I’m so grateful Kelsea saw this basket from a happy, joyful perspective, rather than a grieving one. We all get to choose how we perceive the world around us. Here’s hoping you choose happiness and joy each and every day.

 

 

Over to You…

When you have something drop in that reminds you of a lost loved one, do you generally feel happy or sad?

If you feel sad, do you think it’s possible to shift your perception, so you can feel a little happier?

Do you have a story you’d like to share? If so, I would be so grateful, and I’m sure my readers would be too!

 

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Want to Help Someone? Try Some Positive Thinking http://www.coachlindaryan.com/2016/12/positive-thinking/ http://www.coachlindaryan.com/2016/12/positive-thinking/#respond Sun, 11 Dec 2016 14:43:55 +0000 http://www.coachlindaryan.com/?p=4726 Do you know someone who struggles during the holidays? Or someone who may be struggling during this holiday? Or someone who is struggling, in general? If so, this quote from Abraham will allow you to help them more:   “If you intend to be of assistance, your eye is not upon the trouble but upon […]

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Do you know someone who struggles during the holidays? Or someone who may be struggling during this holiday? Or someone who is struggling, in general?

If so, this quote from Abraham will allow you to help them more:

 

“If you intend to be of assistance, your eye is
not upon the trouble but upon the assistance,
and that is quite different.

When you are looking for a solution, you are
feeling positive emotion— but
when you are looking at a problem,
you are feeling negative emotion.”

 

Think of someone you’re concerned about. Maybe it’s your dear, sweet, 89-year-old Aunt Annie, who seems to be a little wobbly when she walks. Or your college student who’s partying more than he’s/she’s studying. Or maybe it’s a good friend who told you they’d do something for you, but you’re not getting your hopes up, cuz they “always forget.”

Did you know that you greatly increase your chance for a good outcome by actually THINKING about the good outcome? Likewise, you greatly increase the chance of a bad outcome by thinking about the potential bad outcome.

This is important to understand, because the pictures we conjure up in our minds send out an energetic vibration, either good/positive or bad/negative.

For some reason, it feels easier (almost effortless) to conjure up a scene of Aunt Annie falling, breaking her hip, and landing in a hospital bed or nursing home,

 

falen-and-cant-get-up

 

than it is to imagine seeing her cut the rug, at your cousin’s wedding.

 

 

 

My friend, Dana gave me a brilliant insight when I asked how her dear, sweet, 79-year-young Mom was doing. Dana said, “She told me if anyone asks, just tell them I’m fine.”

Here’s why it’s brilliant…

I haven’t seen Dana’s Mom in a couple of years. I know she needs a cane to get around, is still grieving the unexpected, sudden death of her husband, and is living alone in the large home she raised her children in.

Hearing “She’s fine!” keeps the vision I have of her in tact; a clear picture of her smiling, happy face. And when I see that picture in my mind, I (whether I know it or not) emit a positive vibration, in her direction.

If Dana had said something like “She’s really missing my Dad…” or “She has trouble getting around and we’re worried about her, all alone in that big house…” I’d have a very different picture in my mind. And, subconsciously, even though I love Dana’s Mom, I’d be sending her less-than-positive energy.

So if you really intend to help someone
(and I know you do!)
focus on the solution.

If you’re worried about someone, shift your focus away from the worry and towards something that’s good. Anything that’s good. In the case of Dana’s Mom, I can shift away from the picture of her struggling with the walker, and towards the picture of her happy smiling face, in her big beautiful home.

That picture creates a positive energetic vibration, and (again, whether I know it or not) will send good/positive energy her way. And good/positive energy directed at someone always helps; in all ways.

Over to you…

What do you do when you’re worried about someone?

What kind of pictures come up, in your mind?

Can you think of a way to make those pictures a little happier?

Do you think it matters?

 

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